I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
