I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Randomize
