Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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