Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
