get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
You ate ashes out of my bong
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
