The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
