'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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