you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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