Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
