I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Randomize
