he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
