Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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