So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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