i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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