He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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