Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize