how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize