batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm experimenting with sincerity
How does it feel to date your dad?
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
