Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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