I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
