I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Randomize