dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
