at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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