some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
