It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Can I color on your dick again?
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I still have a little drunk in my system
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize