how can u be prego again
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Randomize
