this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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