so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
