So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
