I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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