Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
