Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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