She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I believe in your delicious
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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