it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Randomize
