What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize
