the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
