i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
