I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
