Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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