No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
My dad just said "fuck circus"
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
