I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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