You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
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