My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
