"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
