it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
