I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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