do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
