That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
