yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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