I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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